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[24 Sep 2005|10:47pm] |
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What happen to us? you were everything i wanted and more. i could just tell by the way you looked at me that you loved me. i gave up everything for you and you don't even seem to care . if i'm just waisting my time then let me know. i should of known it was to good to be true.
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| boredom sucks!!!! |
[25 Mar 2005|02:00pm] |
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mood |
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anxious |
] |
i miss the days where i did whatever i wanted and got in trouble all the time... i miss the old jessica!!! the new jessica is boring and sucks fatty cock ( not literally)... seriously the old me had fun all the time... if growing up means becoming a boring loser then fuck growing up. so much has changed since i moved and i hope that things go back to the way they were before i left.... i can't wait till monday i get to finally sauce!!whoo hooo!!! get drunk as fuck!!! and see everyone i missed especially stacey!!!!
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[24 Mar 2005|12:47pm] |
FIRSTS: 1. First best friend:briana coza 2. First love: ross 3. First real kiss: chad boyd 4. First screen name: lilmsprnstar818 5. First pet: a dog name joey 6. First car : a pink 2000 convertable bug that i never got to drive legally
LASTS: 1. Last cigarette: 10mins 2. Last kiss: march 3 :'( 3. Last good cry: sunday 4. Last beverage drank: pepsi 5. Last food consumed: a brownie 6. Last crush: i don't remember 7. Last phone call: my hott ass boyfriend
RELATIONSHIPS: 1. Who is your best friend: robbie 2. Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend: Je$$e
FASHION STUFF: 1. Where are your favorite places to shop: yin , lucky , and nortsroms 2. Favorite item of clothing: my hot pink hard tail pants
SPECIFICS: 1. Do you do drugs: not anymore 2. What kind of shampoo do you use: kerstake... i duno how to spell it its french 3. What are you most scared of: loosing someone i love 4. What would you change about yourself: my boobs
FAVORITES: 1. Colors: pink 2. Foods: ice cream 3. Subject in school: uummm... none 4. Animals: dogs 5. Sports: football 6. Movie:empire records
HAVE YOU EVER: 1. Given anyone a bath: yes 2. Smoked: yes 3. Made yourself throw-up: yea 4. Skinny dipped: once when i was really drunk 5. Been in love: yes and still am
CURRENT: 1. Clothes: my pjs 2. Music: ozzy- crazy train 3. Make-up: none i just woke 4. IMs:none
LAST PERSON: 2. Hugged: my aunt 3. IMed: chris 4. Last person who slept at your house: ummm... i think stacey 5. Last persons house you slept at: Je$$e
RANDOM: 1. In the morning I am: the biggesst bitch till i get my coffe and a cig. 2. Love is: great when ur being loved back 3. I dream about: saucing
PAST/FUTURE: 1. 7 years ago: i was 10 2. 4 years ago: i was a complete idiot about guys 3. 3 years ago: i was the best stacey and i did whatever and had so much fun 4. 1 hour ago: i almost lost the love of my life 5. tomorrow: sleep 6. college: no way
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[20 Mar 2005|09:04pm] |
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mood |
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bitchy |
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i feel like such a whiny little baby. here i am cry over how sucky my life is, when really its not that bad. so many people out there have it so much worse then i have and i realized that i am just a spoiled little brat. we tend to get so caught up in self-pitty that sometimes we forget just how good we have it.
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[19 Mar 2005|06:35pm] |
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mood |
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crushed |
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its crazy how someone can just walk in to your life and totally change who u are and make everything wrong seem right. it funny how once they do that some how your heart gets broke over and over again.
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[19 Mar 2005|01:39am] |
* First grade teacher's name: umm... mrs. gabaya
2* Last word you said: wow
3* Last song you sang: 867-5309
4* Last person you hugged: sadly...my mom
5* Last thing you laughed at: cinco trying to hang up on me
6* Last time you said I dont remember: on the phone with stacey
7* Last time you cried: yesterday
*PRESENT*
9* What color socks are you wearing: none
10* What's under your bed: what isn't!
11* What time did you wake up today: 3 pm
12* Current taste: cigarettes
13* Current hair: down and wavy
15* Current annoyance:bitches who talk shit
16* Current longing: to have sex with my boyfriend
17* Current desktop background: my two dogs
18* Current worry: moving back and nothing going right
19* Current hate: a stupid live journal freak
20* Current favorite article of clothing: my pink hardtail pants
21* Favorite physical feature of the preferred sex: their packages...duh!!!
22* Last CD that you listened to: the steve miller bands greatest hits
23* Favorite place to be: in jesse's bed with him
24* Least favorite place: las vegas
25* What Time You Wake up: mid-afternoon
26* If you could play an instrument, what would it be: drums
27* Favorite color: pink and black
28* Do you believe in an afterlife: kinda
29* How tall are you: 5'1
30* Current favorite word/saying: or not brody
31* Favorite book: the big red barn
32* Favorite season: summer 33* One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: bryan
*FUTURE*
35* Where do you want to go for college? no where
36* What is your career going to be like: i have no clue... hope fully successful
37* How many kids do you want: 3 boys and a girl
*HAVE YOU EVER...*
39* Said "I love you" and meant it: of course
40* Gotten in a fight with your dog/cat/bird/fish: no i am not a loser
41* Been to New York: no
42* Been to Florida: no
43* Been to California: duh
44* Been to Hawaii: no
45* Been to Mexico: no
46* Been to China: no
48* Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: kinda
52* Do you have a crush on someone: yea on my boyfriend
54* Worst feeling in the world: being in las vegas away from jesse and all my friends doing nothing all day, while everyone is having fun
55* What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: i wish jesse was next to me
56* How many rings before you answer: i dunno
57* Future daughter's name: haven
58* Future son's name: seth travis
59* Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: yes.. my nemo
60* If you could have any job you wanted: to do nothing all day and make bank
61* Wish were here: i wish i was in bed with my boyfriend
62* College plans: um i don't think i'm going to go
63* Piercings: yeah
*THE EXTRA STUFF*
64* Do you do drugs: not any more
65* Do you drink: yea!
67* What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use: some french one i can't pronounce
68* What are you most scared of: being alone
69* What clothes do you sleep in: pajamas
70* Who is the last person that called you: cinco 71* Where do you want to get married: somewhere nice
72* If you could change anythin about yourself what would that be: being to nice
73* Who do you really hate: haha not enough room
74* Been In Love: yes
75* Are you timely or always late: always lagging
76* Do you have a job: no
77* Do you like being around people: yea
78* Best feeling in the world: having sex
79* Are you for world peace: yea
80* Are you a health freak: no
81* Do you have a "Type" of person you always go after: potheads/badboys
82* Last Fruit you ate: stawberry
83* Are you lonely right now: yes
84* Ever afraid you'll never get married: yeah
85* Do you want to get married: ofcourse 86* Do you want kids? yes
*IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...*
87* Cried: yes
88* Bought Something: i always buy shit
89* Gotten Sick: no
91* Said I Love You: to the love of my life and my closest friends
92* Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them: no i just tell them
93* Met Someone: ive been meeting 2 many people lately
94* Moved On: a little more
95* Talked To Someone: duh
96* Had A Serious Talk: yes
97* Missed Someone: i always miss people
98* Hugged Someone: yeahhhhhh
99* Yelled at Someone: duh i always yell
100* Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: kind of
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[16 Mar 2005|12:49pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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Its that time of the month again!!!! and no its not my period! its the time were everyone including me feels like shit!!!!!! woop-de- fuckin-do!!!!
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[12 Mar 2005|11:36pm] |
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mood |
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gloomy |
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i miss my boyfriend so fucking much being away from him is killing me.he is seriously on my mind 24/7. i get so jealous when i see people with their boyfriend that i just want to cry.
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[10 Mar 2005|11:08pm] |
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mood |
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contemplative |
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dude i miss the old days.... getting high, fighting, sneaking around and fucking peoples boyfriends(j/k it was one time, well one person and i'd never do that again i'd kill the bitch that would ever fuck je$$e), ditching school, having run-aways live with me (stacey), and so much more.... Now that i graduated its like i have to grow up and i don't want to !!!!!!
i fucking miss my boyfriend like crazy, i miss stacey and all my friends!!! but i'm enjoying spending all my mothers money
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| i'd rather be dead |
[24 Feb 2005|08:35pm] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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its funny how life throws you so many turns and how quickly things change.for months my life has been on track and for once i've been doing good.i have this amazing boyfriend who loves me like i love him and i'm graduating in a week...but fuck these last 3 days have been a fucking nightmare over the stupidest fucking thing...my family hates me and i don't know who my true friends are , but who does.its funny how i do everything for people and in return i get shit on.now that i'm in trouble and i need help i have no one.
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[04 Feb 2005|09:59pm] |
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mood |
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blank |
] |
Wow being grounded really fucking sucks!!!! everyone is out having fun and i'm stuck at home watching the breakfast club and eating ice cream... how cool am i???? God i can't fucking wait to move back!!!! this time its for sure!!! for sure!!! only 26 more days...Next weekend is apartment searching!!!!i'm excited!!!!
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| ~*BiAnCa'S eNtRy*~ |
[22 Jan 2005|05:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
I got my hair dyed today, its red, brown, and blonde. I spent 6 hours at the hair salon, they had to bleach my hair three times to get the black out and then they dyed it and weaved it and toned it. it was such an annoyingly long process.
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[21 Jan 2005|09:18pm] |
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mood |
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bouncy |
] |
I got my license!!!!! whooo whoooo!!!!!!
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| ~*Biancas Entry*~ |
[20 Jan 2005|02:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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relieved |
] |
So my parents went to arizona to check the place out... and my mom said the guys there are gorgeous, and your allowed to smoke (woohoo), she also said the guys range mostly from 18-19. i need to lose like 10 lbs before i go there but i'll prolly only lose 5. today i ran on the treadmill and i've been eating healthy. the way my mom was describing the place to me it seems kinda chill, she said they treat patients like adults, my other rehab treated us like preschoolers. my hair is soo curly its like a little afro puff.
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| ~*Biancas Entry~* |
[19 Jan 2005|10:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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naughty |
] |
I love my Jessica McGuire sooo much!!! Jess you'll do great on your driving test! im gonna crosz my fingers and pray for you (do jewish people pray?)... im counting on seeing you in the valley on the 28th of january. i have to see you before i go! You know what i dont get about valley kids? i dont get how when i used to tweak everyone hated me n everyone made me out to be a phsyco crackwhore and now everyone is tweaking and since everyone is doing it they cant hate eachother for tweaking cuz all the tweakers tweak together! i wish there was a rehab in the valley so i wouldnt have to go to arizona! i hope they let me smoke my ciggerettes at this new place. the age at this place is from 17-25. there better be some hot guys over there cuz if im gonna be there for four months i need to get laid. My hair is getting long! I've had short hair for for 2 1/2 years wow!!! long time. i hate having short hair i feel like people look at me n think im a dyke. im not a dyke i love boys. i went to see white noise with my brother, omg i almost shat on myself, it was soooo scary wow. ok i have to study now
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[17 Jan 2005|08:52pm] |
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mood |
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chipper |
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YEAH! the car show was quite an experience...HaHaHa...what a fucking burn!!! lol but its funny when you really think about it. At least i got to see my baby and my bffe!!!!
I get my licence on friday (hopefully)!!!!
Watch out everyone another fucking asian on the road!
5 more weeks till i graduate!!! WHOOOO!!!! i will be officially living in the valley and broken free from these tight ass asian that i live with!!! omg i'm so excited!!!!
I'll miss you bianca!!!! bffe!!!!
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| ~Biancas Entry~ |
[16 Jan 2005|10:41pm] |
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mood |
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hopeful |
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The car show was boring, I only went to hang out with Jessica. That might be the last time I hang out with Jessica for a very long time (dont worry jess i will be back soon!)I need to go because I want to get better... When I get back I will have a lot of sober time, im finally gonna go to NA and get a stupid 90 day chip!!! My parents are going to arizona on thursday to check the place out, and if they like it im leaving at the beginning of febuary. For my going away present my mom is taking me shopping, woohoo!! Im gonna be the best dressed person in rehab!!
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| *biancas entry* |
[06 Jan 2005|03:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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blah |
] |
I hope to god my mom doesnt send me out of state, shes highly considering it. My parents found a bunch of places to send me. My mom doesnt trust me around guys, so whereever she wants to send me i'll prolly be stuck with a bunch of girls, yuckie! My mom discovered my secret piercings a year after i got my secret piercings pierced, she told me to take them out so i did and now its really hard to put them back in. I made my mom promise me that if she sends me out of state that she wont get rid of pheobe. I want to stop using, but its the hardest thing in the world. as much as i would not want to go out of state i know i need to. blah whatever, i dont know what else to write
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| ~*Bianca's Entry*~ |
[06 Jan 2005|01:41pm] |
You can dress me up in diamonds You can dress me up in dirt You can throw me like a lineman I like it better when it hurts Oh, I have waited here for you I have waited
You make me wanna lala in the kitchen on the floor I'll be your French maid where I meet you at the door I'm like an alley cat Drink the milk up I want more You make me wanna You make me wanna scream
You can meet me on an aeroplane Or in the back of the bus You can throw me like a boomerang I'll come back and beat you up Oh, I have waited here for you Don't keep me waiting
You make me wanna lala in the kitchen on the floor I'll be your French maid where I meet you at the door I'm like an alley cat Drink the milk up I want more You make me wanna
You make me wanna lala in the kitchen on the floor I'll be your French maid where I meet you at the door I'm like an alley cat Drink the milk up I want more You make me wanna You make me wanna scream
(Lala lala lala lala)
I feel safe with you I can be myself tonight It's alright with you Cause you hold my secrets tight You do, you do
You make me wanna lala lalala lalala lalalala lala You make me wanna lala lalala
You make me wanna lala in the kitchen on the floor I'll be your French maid where I meet you at the door I'm like an alley cat Drink the milk up I want more You make me wanna
You make me wanna lala in the kitchen on the floor I'll be your French maid where I meet you at the door I'm like an alley cat Drink the milk up I want more You make me wanna You make me wanna scream
You make me wanna lala lalala lalala lalala lala You make me wanna lala lalala lalala lalala lala You make me wanna lala lalala lalala lalala lala
(Lala lala lala)
I love Jessica!!! Jessica rocks my world!!
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[05 Jan 2005|08:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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loved |
] |
Eventhough new years didn't go as planned and was kinda chaotic, it was the best new years ever...I could careless if i cried and got all mad and spent the remaining of the night in an alley... My baby went through hell to be with me and kiss me at 12 regaurdless of the consequences. just being in his arms and kissing him knowing i finally have someone who loves me as much as i love him made everything that went wrong that night disappear.
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